Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Miley. And trying to reconcile my feelings about slut shaming.

So those VMA's were something, huh?  I generally only watch MTV for Catfish and shows about Teenage Mothers, so I surprised myself when I kept watching after Lady Gaga performed.  She was all I really cared to see due to the over the top nature of her performances. 
In all honestly, the only things I have ever known about Miley Cyrus are what I have seen on SNL

I was too old for Hannah Montana, and only within the last few year have I really embraced my love for certain pop music.  I am a music snob from way back.  Vanessa Bayer is super funny as Miley though...

So from what I have read as of late, Miley is trying really hard to shed her Disney image and let people know that she is an adult, and doing adulty things.  I mean, we saw this happen with Britney, and X-tina - we aren't re-inventing the wheel here.  It is funny too, just days before the VMAs happened, Aaron and I were discussing how Miley probably does the best job of 'being wild' without totally wrecking her life (ahem, Amanda Bynes, Lindsey Lohan, etc.). 

So anyway, Miley got wild at the VMA's for sure.  My initial reaction was that my jaw was on the floor.  To me, she didn't look over the age of 17-18, and I thought, did her Dad/Momager okay this?  But then I looked her up and she is 20.  And then I had to let what I just saw marinate in my brain for a day to figure out what I thought about it.

I thought it was gross, and just too much.  Robin Thicke is like twice her age almost and she is all grinding on him and touching herself with this foam finger wearing next to nothing made to look like even less.  If you are trying to show us that you are grown, #youaredoingitwrong. 

Then I thought about slut shaming, and how I am generally against it.  If only for the double standard women are held to.  If it is wrong for her to be doing her thing, then it should be just as wrong when he does it. 

However it is my personal belief that there isn't enough shame in the world.  Not that it is everyone's job to go around shaming people for things, but that people don't feel personally ashamed for things they should.  People of Wal-Mart exists for this reason.  If you won't feel enough shame to put shoes on to go into a store, the internet will try to coerce you (and laugh at you in the process).  Yet reality TV, one of the loves of my life, is all about shaming others.  We watch real housewives to laugh at how dumb and frivolous rich ladies are, we watch the Duggars to judge them at how dumb it was to have so many kids, we watch Honey Boo Boo to laugh at how poor and fat they are.  I feel like media (and in turn, society) is making us this way - ie: terrible people. 

But I thought about that performance and how different my reaction would have been if it were Lady Gaga.  I guarantee I would have tried to find the message behind it - what was she trying to express?  Ending with, oh, that is just Lady Gaga being Lady Gaga.  Then again, she was never in the public eye as a child. 

I think the main problem with Miley being Miley is that we knew her when she was young and innocent.  I think it is difficult for that transition to happen with anyone you know.  It was like when I saw my little cousin grow up and get a bunch of tattoos and openly discuss smoking weed.  It is a tough pill to swallow.  He is always a little kid to me. 

My (#oldlady) problem was just that MTV is supposed to be geared towards young people and this performance was just borderline pornographic.  Kids ought not get such messages, in my opinion...

So yeah, I can't totally fault Miley for the things she does, but I don't think I'd let any kids of mine watch MTV until they can go to a rated R movie. 
Per Aaron, really the only people who should be offended are Robin Thicke's wife, and bears.  lol.
What do you think?


Chelsee W said...

Gosh I thought her performance was nothing but trashy. I am pretty open minded but I think she took it too far.

Judy Conaton said...

What I said to Chris last night was that it felt like a little kid who was going, "HEY! LOOK AT ME! I'M A BIG KID! I CAN DO BIG KID STUFF!" But really she just made herself look like a dumb little kid who was trying way too hard to fit in.

However, she does have almost everyone in America talking about her. So in that way she was very successful.

Bekah Loves Blog said...

I get the coming of age thing, but it screamed "I need attention!" She just doesn't know how to get it. I'm a bit sad for her actually. Celebs have their crazy moments for sure....but this one felt more like a cry for help...or for something.

That commercial is hilarious!

Amanda said...

Yeah that show was definitely something else.. I felt dirty just from watching it. There is wild and crazy, and then there is just nasty. I don't think anyone should ever act like that, no matter what their age is. I can understand if she wants to act sexy to make people to think she is grown up. But that wasn't even sexy.. So much tongue and humping. Yuck. And what was up with that outfit? We've all seen weird outfits before, but this was just soooo unflattering. I think the whole performance would have been better if she was actually dressed sexy and put that foam finger away.

Lindsey said...

-I don't care how old she was grody. Replace her with anyone and it's still tacky as all get out.

-I don't watch Honey Boo Boo b/c I find it disgraceful that America would put them (poor/uneducated) on TV for entertainment.

-I cannot watch the Duggars because even with 19 kids and pretty extreme reglious views, they are better parents then 98% of parents out there. It's disappointing.

Brittany Spears managed to make it to 21/22 before she became a train wreck so don't hold out too much hope for Miley after the last few months...she'll end up like the rest of 'em.

Kelly Louise said...

i love your lady gaga analogy. no one would talk crap at all if that was her up there doing that same exact performance. i wrote about miley today too, i'm not gonna hate on her. she's figuring things out right now, it's really not that big of a deal. everyone will get over just like they did with xtina and brit.

Anonymous said...

I didn't watch the VMAs but at this point it's impossible not to know what happened. I've seen enough clips and images, I don't need to watch the video. She's just doing it ALL wrong. The hair, the tongue, the clothes - she's just a mess. A natural (hopefully since we haven't really seen anythign with her and drugs) mess.

Megan said...

What I don't understand is why things like that are classified as being "grown up" or an "adult." To me, when celebrities act like that, it's immature. If you're truly growing up, we don't need you to show us how grown up you are.

Laura said...

lOLOLOLOL I am lmao at Aaron's remark...bears should DEF. be offended! LOL I think you approach this topic very rationally. I feel the same way you do!

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